A precious little girl walks into
a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, "Excuthe
me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?" As the
shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees,
so that he's on her level, and asks, "Do you want a
widdle white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabby
or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabby over
there?" She, in turn blushes, rocks on her heels,
puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says
in a quiet voice, "I don't fink my pet python weally
gives a thit.
A young couple were on their
way to Vegas to get married. Before getting there,
the girl said to the guy that she had a confession
to make. The reason that they have not been too
intimate is because she is very flat chested.
"If you want to cancel the wedding, then I'll
understand," she said. The guy remarked, "I don't
mind that you're flat, and sex is not the most
important thing in a marriage anyway."
Several miles down the road, the guy turned to the
girl and said that he also had a confession to make.
The reason that they have not been too intimate is
because he is just like a baby below the waist. The
girl remarked, "I don't mind that like a baby below
the
waist, and sex is not the most important thing in a
marriage anyway."
And so, the happy couple went on to Vegas and got
married. On their wedding night, the girl took off
her clothes. True to her word, she is as flat as a
washboard. Then, the guy took
off his clothes. After one glance at his naked body,
the girl fainted and fell to the floor.
When she regained consciousness, the guy said, "I
told you before we got married, so why were you so
surprised?"
"You told me it was just like a baby." The guy
replied, "It is! 8 pounds and 21 inches long!"
A young female teacher was
giving her class of six year olds a quiz "behind my
back I've got something red, round and you can eat
it. what is it?" she asked. "an apple" replied
little Raymond "no," said the teacher " it's a
tomato but it shows your thinking." "I've now got
something round, a greenish colored you can eat it."
"An apple," replied little Ian "No it's an onion,
but it shows your thinking." Little scruffy Johnny
at the back of the class says "I've got something
under my desk that's an inch long, white and it has
a red end." "Dirty little boy," said the teacher "No
it's a match, but it shows you were thinking," he
answered. |
